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Journals / Title: TTC #1: aged 38 and overweight (it rhymes!)

Author: MsShopper
Introduction

About me: Married, 38, trying for baby #1, and dealing with weight issues, diabetes and other body glitches!

Months trying to conceive: April 2014 onwards

My story: Having worked in a rather stressful career in London for the past 15 years, I decided last year that it was time to make a change. My husband and I relocated back to our home town, and I swapped to a much more sane working environment. Six months later (having overcome some health challenges caused by all the stress), we're now at the beginning of the TTC journey. However, as I'm 38, diabetic and overweight, my journey is as much about getting myself healthy as trying for a baby. Wish me luck! xx

My emotions: Nervous about what challenges lie ahead, but excited to get started!

20th March, 5:41 pm

I feel like I've been in pregnancy planning mode forever, and we haven't even officially started trying yet!

I started the year weighing 18 stone - probably the heaviest I've ever been. I was in denial about my weight for a very long time. I knew last year that I wanted us to start TTC, but every time I thought about trying to slim down for pregnancy it would set off my stress-eating. To be honest, my stress levels were so bad at the time, it was probably just the icing on the cake. (Mmm, cake... Just kidding!)

Anyway, I began this year in a very different place, both literally and figuratively. Last September, my husband and I relocated to our home town, and I started a lovely new job that doesn't send my stress levels soaring. After a few months of adjusting to the new, calmer work/life balance, we both got on a healthy-eating kick in January, and I've been losing about a pound a week since then. The stress eating has gone, and every time I get a craving for something 'naughty' I just have to think about our baby-to-be and it goes away. Hooray! The scales showed 16st, 13lb for the first time in a long time on Sunday. I am going to make sure it keeps going in that direction until we, all going well, get our BPF!

Alongside that, I've been giving my diabetes some much-needed focus. I can't consider TTC until my blood sugar levels are pretty much perfect, and before this year I found keeping them stable to be a real challenge. But I knuckled down, did lots of research, trial and error, and finally figured out what works for me. I have a HbA1c blood test tomorrow and should get the results back next week. If my blood sugar is where it needs to be, then we can get going!

Aside from diet and diabetes, I have some concerns around my cycle and ovaries. I get intermittent left ovary pain, which seems to have gotten worse and more frequent recently. Also my cycle is long (c38 days) and my periods short (2-3 days). I am worried that all of that doesn't bode well for our chances of conceiving, but as we haven't properly started TTC yet, who knows? I'll mention this to my GP when I see her next week. I'm hoping she will refer me for a scan, to get to the bottom of the ovary pain if nothing else.

And last but not least, having done some reading about preparing for pregnancy, I have embarked on a bunch of health supplements: a prenatal vitamin, 5mg folic acid (prescribed by my GP), evening primrose oil, omega 3 and CoQ10. Plus cinnamon to help regulate my blood sugar. Every little helps, I hope!

A lengthy first post, and thanks for reading if you got this far. I’ll update again once I’ve seen my GP, with hopefully the green light to jump on board the baby-making train! x


Message edited by the author 20th March, 11:26 pm

4 Comments (show)
27th March, 10:50 am

Exciting news this morning. I saw my GP and she confirmed that I've improved my blood sugars to pregnancy-approved levels. Hooray! That means we can officially start TTC as of my next ovulation (roughly mid-April, all going well).

She also gave me an internal exam (yack, but I guess if I do get pregnant I'll have to get used to it!) and she couldn't find any signs of an ovarian cyst. She's referred me for an ultrasound though, so I'm not out of the woods yet.

She asked about AF and I told her about my long cycles and short periods, but she didn't seem to think it was significant. I guess we need to tackle one thing at a time!

I am feeling buoyant about things now, which is a good feeling on which to embark on the whole TTC journey. Here's hoping it lasts! x

4 Comments (show)
29th March, 9:51 pm

While waiting impatiently for AF to arrive so I can start the countdown to O Day, I've spent a bit of time this weekend officially Getting Ahead of Myself™. This has entailed:

• Educating myself on the mysteries of cots, cribs, pushchairs and 'travel systems'. (How on earth do people know which ones are actually good and which ones are actually overpriced, OTT and all about the label?)

• Bookmarking cute-but-practical things like baby swings. (Is it wrong to pick one simply because it would match our living room?)

• Looking up primary schools and (oh, this is getting silly now) secondary schools in our local area.

I know it's a bit daft to be getting carried away before we've even started officially trying, and I'm sure DH thinks I've lost the plot already. But I have to confess I am enjoying it! :)

1 Comment (show)
8th April, 8:41 pm

And so it begins! Aunt Flo arrived yesterday afternoon, along with her usual travelling companions: Sore Boobs, Spotty Chin and Grumpy Britches. Though I have to admit, now that I'm monitoring my cycle and reading up on all things hormonal, it's a bit fascinating to notice those hormones in action and working the way they're supposed to, more or less.

I had hoped that all the supplements I've been taking might shorten my cycle by a day or two, but it took the predicted 37 days. Still, I've only been on them a few weeks. I've also added three more as of today: Maca, L-Arginine and DHEA. They are all supposed to be beneficial for egg quality, which is my biggest concern at this stage. My eggs are not getting any younger, and I do worry about any strain that my previous patchy diabetes management may have put on them. Hopefully, with several months of good control and enough health supplements to make me shake like a maraca, I'll be okay!

I've started temping this cycle too, which I'm hoping I can stick to. I'm not exactly a morning person - my usual response to my phone's alarm is to stuff it under my pillow and go back to sleep! But I would like a better indication of whether I'm ovulating. I never had so much as a pregnancy 'scare' growing up, so it does make me wonder if I even can.

Despite the uncertainty, though, it feels good finally to be on the TTC trail, after all those months of planning and preparing. Now excuse me while I down another handful of tablets, followed by a healthy swig of grapefruit juice! :)

2 Comments (show)
16th April, 11:05 pm

Hey ladies, just a couple of questions for you...

1) Do you pay for premium membership? My complimentary first month free is up soon and I'm wondering if it's worth paying to extend it.
2) Does this site have a forum? I've seen reference to 'topics' and 'posts' (separate from the journals), but can't see any links to a forum!

Thanks,
Anna xx

3 Comments (show)
22nd April, 7:26 pm

Well, after much impatience, my Ov Day is finally on its way. Hooray!

If this cycle tallies with last month's, it will be in 5 days. I had a bit of EWCM yesterday, which is two days earlier than last month, though it seems to have disappeared today. Hopefully it will come back tomorrow - otherwise the grapefruit juice has truly let me down!

I've been temping this cycle, but my sleep patterns have been a little erratic over the bank holiday weekend so I've had to discount a few readings. Before that, I was doing pretty well! I need to get that back on track, as it would be good to have confirmation that I am ovulating.

What's good is that DH and I have the rest of the week booked off work, so the way is clear for plenty of OPKs and BDing! The latter is where I'm struggling a bit. Our sex life is pretty spontaneous, in that neither of us is in the habit of pre-planned seduction. It's usually one of us getting in the mood at random moments, usually when we're having a lazy weekend. So me piping up from the loo yesterday (after spotting the EWCM) with: "Ooh, I think I'm fertile. Shall we have some sex?" didn't really drive him wild with excitement, put it that way!

The other complication is that DH struggles with depression, which can be a romance killer for him. There's no point in me stressing about that, as it would only make things worse. He's currently coming off anti-depressants after several years on them, and is doing quite well. But I'm conscious of not putting any pressure on him, especially as we're so early on in the TTC process.

So on that note, any tips ladies (if you don't mind)? How do you initiate BDing while keeping things fun and pressure-free? :)

6 Comments (show)
28th April, 11:40 pm

I'm now the other side of ovulating and officially in TWW territory. However, I seriously doubt we've pulled it off this time.

As I thought might happen, DH and I had an interesting lead-up to Ov Day, with me trying (and sometimes failing) to keep all references to DTD light and fun, and him doing just about anything to avoid it!

The day *AFTER* I got a positive OPK, he seemed to relax and we finally DTD, twice in the same day. He confessed he had been feeling the pressure, partly from me and partly self-inflicted. I did my best to reassure him, and I'm hopeful it will be less of an issue next month!

So not the best start really, but on balance that's probably okay. I would like to lose a bit more weight before falling pregnant (my target is at least 10% reduction in BMI, and I'm at about 5% now). Plus, I would prefer to not be visibly pregnant by September as my job's one-year contract is up for renewal (hopefully to be made permanent) and I wouldn't want to have to declare it until afterwards, just in case!

My other TTC drama has been about temping. My morning readings have been quite erratic, but yesterday (3DPO) it went a bit crazy: my lowest temp all cycle at 35.1˚. I thought for sure that meant I hadn't ovulated, which put me in a serious bad mood all morning.

However, I'd also woken up with low blood sugar (a 'hypo'), which I usually get a couple of times a week, and lo and behold a quick Google revealed that a side-effect of hypos is lowered body temperature. I had no idea! This morning I had normal blood sugar and my temp was 36.3˚, the highest all cycle so far. So fingers crossed I did ovulate after all!

Aside from that, I have an ultrasound scan mid next week to see whether I have any signs of ovarian cysts. I've been getting random pains, mainly on my left side, but it hasn't been as bad this month for some reason. I know that cysts can sometimes go away on their own, so maybe it will be good news. Or maybe it'll be the start of more prodding and poking. I'll keep you posted. :)

4 Comments (show)
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